Thursday, 8 March 2018

How to Move On

We have all been in a situation where we'd instead cut all ties than ever feel heartbreak again.

It's so hard. Even if they act like they couldn't give a damn, every part of your body aches thinking about what could have been.

Even worse when it is someone who comes into your life when you weren't ready to open up, yet you find yourself doing so anyway because the flame in your soul is reignited. They manage to carve away the ice surrounding your cold heart and then leave.

They spend months begging for you to just give them a chance, and although you're petrified of developing feelings, you do so because the fear floats away everytime you hear their voice. 

They remember your birthday and how much you like watching a TV show, even down to your favourite character. You find yourself thinking a little too often about how it wouldn't 'be so bad' if you let them in. You start to tell them everything about yourself, and you want to know every detail about their day just to hear them laugh.

The friendly banter turns into thoughtful compliments. 

You are fearless. Nothing they could do could take away the blindness that is infatuation or worse... love. Despite the anxiety swelling your brain, you desperately break down the walls you spent years building because you want to keep them in your heart and throw away the key. 

Relief rushes over you when the 'honeymoon period' is extended, could it really get any better than this? Is that even possible? Perfection with every breathe. 

But then, unfortunately, the satisfaction turns to suffocation, and you're left behind to clean up the mess they abandoned without any reason. You gave them everything and then some. It sucks, doesn't it?

Time is precious. 

You mustn't waste it on someone who couldn't see how kind and loving you are. Keep it to yourself. Be selfish. Love with all you have, but only if you provide it for yourself first.

Moving on isn't as difficult as it might seem. Stop re-reading old messages that filled your stomach with butterflies and instead notice the silence that remains. 

Try your best not to check when they were last active on social media, it could've been seconds ago, and they still haven't thought about you long enough to send you something. Ignore the likes they leave on what you might consider as 'competition'. Who cares! You are unique and special in your own way, if they want someone else, let them. They will never find another you.

Focus on you

The best decision you can make is when you begin to focus on you. Think about your feelings and how much better you will feel once all of this mess is in the past. Someone who is sure of you will come along sooner than you think but don't make that the primary goal.

I would rather spend my time with someone who knew just how great I an for them. There is no hesitation, no overthinking or wondering whether you're good enough. The right person will never allow you to question their intentions or feelings. You will just know. 

They will never change, however much you would like them to. No one changes. They merely reveal their true selves as time goes on and I do not desire the wait for a phone call or getting let down. You deserve better than that. 

I know it is hard, but with time you will come to realise your self-worth. They can seem like the most amazing person in the world. The dream you don't want to wake up from, but actions speak far louder than words. Remember: the biggest coward is someone who awakens your love with no intention of loving you.

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