Thursday, 13 October 2016

Yes... I got fat.

I have. I comfort ate until the cows came home and now I am one. But it's not going to stay that way.

I have. I comfort ate until the cows came home and now I am one. But it's not going to stay that way.


In school I was always slim, I had a petite frame that complimented my not so small butt. I was confident enough to feel content with myself. Since then, I've struggled with my weight. It was ever since I turned 17. Don't ask me why it all changed at that age, perhaps my brain switched from child to adult and I suddenly piled on the pounds just by looking at a doughnut.


Now that's not entirely accurate. I only have myself to blame. No one shoved McDonalds and chocolate down my throat; that was all me. 

It seemed as if the more weight I gained, the more food I would eat. I am a certified comfort eater, and as soon as I feel any stress, I will use food to make me feel better. And while I have no excuses, I must admit my short height of 5ft 2 certainly doesn't help my figure when I gain a few pounds.

Last year I joined slimming world and was super successful with it, managing to lose all of the weight I gained and I felt better than ever! I was wearing bikinis for the first time in my life and going out in nothing less than a crop top and shorts. 


I have. I comfort ate until the cows came home and now I am one. But it's not going to stay that way.
Half a stone loss in my second week of SW

I have. I comfort ate until the cows came home and now I am one. But it's not going to stay that way.
One stone off!

I have. I comfort ate until the cows came home and now I am one. But it's not going to stay that way.
Yay, bikinis!

I have. I comfort ate until the cows came home and now I am one. But it's not going to stay that way.
Only 10 pounds difference here!

This year, however, I managed to put it all back on and more. We have all been there, right? I will never use my mind as an excuse, but sometimes if you're not well on the inside, you're not going to look your best on the outside. It's a vicious cycle that only you can break, and I know I'm still fighting the battle.

While I have never had anyone insult me or call me fat to my face, I know 100% it is being said behind my back. You can't help that, if someone has put on a recognisable amount of weight people are expected to talk. It makes me anxious even thinking that my weight is the topic of some people's conversations, but thankfully I know it's because they're an arsehole...

I know that old flames and ex-friends are probably saying ' Oh my god, have you seen how fat Shannon has got?' and while I must admit it angers me to think about, it's my own damn fault!

I suppose I am writing this post to put myself out there. Letting the world know that I am well aware of how I look but whether they think negatively about me or not, I am doing this for me and my happiness.

Perhaps I will document my body acceptance journey on my blog, what do you think? I believe it's an obstacle most girls and boys at any age face. It's a huge insecurity many people have to deal with.

I am not obese. I'm simply two stone overweight, and even losing one stone; I will get back to being slim and healthy. 

Unfortunately, until then, yes, I will always be a little bit fat. 

xoxo





8 comments :

  1. This is a great post, I deal with the same issue, and I hope I'll get out of that vicious circle one day.. -K

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    Replies
    1. Thanks hun, dont worry you're beautiful! You can do it xxx

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  2. Such a great post Shannon & thank you for sharing. You're definitely not alone, I'm in the exact same boat, I've put two stones on & I know that by losing one stone I'll be getting back to being healthy, too. We can do it girl, you'll have lost it in no time & I'll be right there with you! Xxx

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    Replies
    1. Thanks gorgeous!! We can do this together, and we will feel fabulous again! all the love xxx

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  3. I honestly can't relate to this blog post more. I was the exact same - in school I had such a freakishly fast metabolism where I would never gain weight. It was around 17 years old as well when I started to gain weight and it was horrible. Because I had been so used to being able to eat anything it was a real shock to the system realizing that sometimes I should say no to a donut or burgers. For me it's been a similar journey - sometimes I go well and lose a lot of weight - and then sometimes i'll gain it all back again. So glad to read a post by someone who just gets it. So nice being able to exactly relate to someone!
    Holly x https://www.bloglovin.com/blogs/chronicles-holly-13610625

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  4. Just because you've gained weight doesn't make you a cow or less attractive. That's actually pretty upsetting that you see yourself like that. You're beautiful no matter what you weigh.

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